abyssdressing | Spa Room/JADE EMBARRASSMENT ROOM.

[And it appears one of the most obnoxious Jades in the dressing room is wandering around. Lo and behold, he comes across a nice-looking building, decorated and quite snazzy. It was all gold trim and lush red paint. Viewing the inside through the glass pane door, he could see it was just as lavish on the inside as it was on the outside.]

[And the word 'SPA' is across the top in fonic glyphs. Well, well. Can't blame a man for trying it out.]

[So he rents a bathing suit--damn, just like the one Peony made him wear in the Keterburg version of the spa--and goes to change into the navy speedo-like suit in the back rooms. It appears the spa is deserted for now, save for the clerk at the front desk. Albeit her eyes looked a bit... dead.]

[No one else here? Well, we'll just carry the robes, then, and make our way over to the hot spring water. He'll just test it with his toe before dipping in and leaving his towel and robes at the side for later. The glasses were coming off, and his hair was going to be tied up in a psuedo-bun at the back of his head. Aah~ This was the life~]

[[OOC: EVER BEEN SUBJECTED TO EMBARRASSMENT BY COLONEL JADE CURTISS? HAVE YOU HAD TO ENDURE THE TORTUROUS AND SNIDE MOCKING FROM THIS OLD MAN FOR YEARS? COME DISH OUT A BIT OF WHAT HE'S BEEN MISSING TO THE TWAT. Side-effects may include: dry mouth, heavy breathing, flushed face, increased respiration, and elevated heartbeat in females (and some males). Other side-effects may include: repulsion, vomiting, and uncontrollable laughter.]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[He doesn't bathe with them on--nor sleep, for that matter--regardless of how it might deteriorate his eyes more quickly. It was best to keep them out of the water. He would go blind one day because of his own youthful foolishness, but now was not the time to worry about that. He had a good thirty years before that with his glasses, at least.]

Hm~? I've been here, Luke. Maybe you should learn the fine art of paying attention.

Especially when you go around half-drowning the elderly.

I do pay attention! Most of the time. If you're afraid of drowning then we ought to tie a rope around you, just in case.

[ Not even you can escape the joys of being an old fart, Jade. And you do it so stylishly, if we may say so. ...he'd look pretty creepy without the glasses, though not as much as he does now with no shirt.

...wait. No shirt?

..........oh Lorelei. DontlookLukesweetYuliaontoastdontlook! ]

Edited 2009-11-18 02:03 (UTC)

[Jade just smiled.] Around my neck? Why, Luke, I wasn't aware I was a war criminal. I'm glad you think so highly of me.

... [He'll just be sinking a little bit in the water. Someone here was a bit too modest about his body.]

Hey, you said it, not me. You're welcome to just bite it. It'd serve a couple purposes then.

[ Since when was Jade ever modest about anything? It doesn't take her long to figure out that the familiar bathrobe probably means he's wearing Peony's sorry excuse for a bathing suit, and starts drifting to the other side of the water. You're such a perv, Peony! Geez! ]

Luke! I'm hurt! You want me dead? Poor, innocent me?

[Jade is actually quite modest. It's mostly sarcasm you hear about him knowing everything. Good Lorelei, he was. But he wanted to embarass Jade, mostly. It worked quite well.]

Innocent my ass. I look at it this way; if Dist can survive having his head beaten in so many times, you aren't about to kick the bucket anytime in the near future.

[ Comes from being holed up in that office all the time. Lack of fresh air makes you wilt! ]

Oh, but Dist is a cockroach. I'm a feeble old man, frail... [COUGH, COUGH.]

[Wait, what came from being holed up in an office? ... My frailty? Yes, of course, I'm well aware.]

[ Giving you our best Asch-face now. ] So that makes you an old and frail cockroach?

[ And being modest. Look at Luke! Running around Auldrant in clothes like that leaves one with little modesty. ]

I suppose it would. Ah, I guess I'll be dead, soon.

[Pfft. He went from being an arrogant, self-centered teenager to internally modest and reserved. He couldn't let his ego take ahold of him again, not without consequences like the last time he had.]

So you'll just have to snatch somebody else's body. That's what a necromancer does, right?

[ Still not sure which is worse; the ego or the sarcasm. ...No, scratch that. The bathing suit wins hands down. She'll be having fun making waves on her side of the water. ]

Hm. Perhaps if you would be so willing, Luke~

[Is he closing in? Oh, Lorelei, he is.]

E-eh? Willing to what?

[ MAYBETHISWASABADIDEA. Scratch that. There's no maybe about it! Edging backwards, kthx. ]

Willing to lend me your body so I can be immortal, of course.

[Moving forward~ Evil ~~rape~~ smile on~]

Huh?! N..no way! You don't want this one anyways! It's more worn and used than you!

[ Sloshing through the water faster. Why did this always happen to her? ]

Somehow I highly doubt that.

[Because you're rape-able, Luke. But he'll be staying on his side of the water, now.] But now that I think about it... I'd rather be known as 'Necromancer' than 'half-baked noble.'

You should know Asch doesn't play nice!

[ Very much so. Though now it's her turn to chase after, splashing water in his direction. ] HEY! Who're you calling "half-baked"?!

Oh? I guess I should have assumed he was a rough lover, too. [God, Jade.]

[And he'll be swishing back over to his spot. ... Also, splashing her in the face. Have some nice, hot spring water, Luke.] Why, that rock over there. Didn't you know it's called the "Half-Baked Noble?" I heard it from the clerk at the front when I checked in.

THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH!

[ Not denying it. Sputters out of both embarrassment and rage, sending even more water at him. Oooooh, you can be suck a jerkface, Jade! Four-eyed asshole! ] The only thing half-baked around here is you!

[He'll be lifting up his arms to guard against Luke's splash attack. ~~Luke used Splash! Nothing happened.~~]

[On top of that, you won't be hearing the fon verse he's saying until you get a nice splash of cold water in the face. Ice cold.]

[ ~~DAMMIT! Just you wait until Luke evolves!~~ Sitting in a nice piping hot bath doesn't help one iota when the parts above water get frozen. Which would explain why the replica makes a noise short of a shriek as she falls over, sending a wave towards the colonel. That's just playing dirty! ]

Spa Room/JADE EMBARRASSMENT ROOM.

Jade loves <s>to torment</s> you, too~

Figures. 8|

Come here, Luke~

D-do we have to?

Yes. Always.

Only because you're like a second father.

Oh, how sweet of you, Luke. Now you, too, can have the experience of having two fathers.

So long as said fathers aren't hitched to each other, we're good.

Oh, but we are. Didn't you know?

。。。

I'll take that as a no.

Wise move.

He is quite the exquisite lover, though.

MEDIC. GET THE BRAIN BLEACH. DX

I have some you can borrow, Luke~ I can't guarantee the toxicity of it, however...

That's probably what Dist has been sniffing to drive him bonkers...

Yes. Too much Brain Bleach. Because that's perfectly plausible, Luke.

It makes sense! Dist is nutty enough.

Try quicksilver.

There's nothing quick about Dist.