abyssdressing | (no subject)

[ Boy, if he could punch you in the face right now... ]

Get your ass down from there and let me out!

[ There seriously isn't enough room in this damn cage for both him and the table, plus his patience is dropping faster than Luke can Sonido. Just in case the order wasn't clear enough, Asch throws in a few kicks for good measure. ]

[Quit kicking the ~~door~~ cage, Asch. Luke just chuckled, sitting down on top of the cage.]

I don't know. Aren't birds supposed to sing when they're in cages?

[ Shut up. He's pretending it's your face so he won't feel like inflicting damage upon the real thing later. ]

One, I don't sing. Two, I'm not a damn bird! Three, what are you doing with this idiotic contraption!

[ While Asch realizes banging on the bars is futile, it's the only way he can think of to vent. And does he ever need to vent if this is how Luke treats his friends. ]

Aw, but I always wondered how sexy your voice would sound singing.

[Yes, he said that. He pauses to let that sink in, leaning back and swinging his legs back and forth.]

Why else would I have a cage? I'm hunting for specimens, of course.

[ As expected, it takes that extra moment for Asch to process the innuendo and respond with an appropriately indignant sputter. One day he would learn. Maybe. He's thankful for the subject change anyway. ]

We've been over this before! You keep using people indiscriminately and someone will retaliate in kind. Arrancar or not, you won't be immune to everything.

No, but I'm immune to most things~

[He reached over, opening a small hatch on the cage, before swinging himself inside. Uh oh, Asch... alone in a cage with a mad replica.]

Besides~ I know how to handle myself~

I know you're well aware that isn't the point I'm trying to make!

[ In his opinion, there are some things that shouldn't need to be voiced, such as his feelings on using people they know for experimentation purposes. And per usual, reasoning with Luke is proving difficult. Mad Asch versus mad replica: who will win? ]

What are you doing?

[Ah, but Luke is the fun kind of mad. The kind of crazy that would just strut up to a pissed off winged original and start kissing him like they were in the middle of some wild and crazy sex.]

[He backed off quickly, at least, casually draping his arms over Asch's shoulders.]

Isn't it obvious? I missed you.

[ That... is not the worst kind of mad Asch has had to deal with, though it throws him for a loop almost as much as Van or Mohs' brand of crazy would. It really had been a good while since he'd had consistent company, and that led to Asch attempting to reacclimate himself towards being impersonal under the pretense of sparing everyone unnecessary pain. ]

[ Meaning a good many feathers join the cake carnage on the ground while Asch does a lovely impression of a statue. ]

... S-so I gathered.

[Luke let out an amused laugh, grinning broadly at Asch.]

Aw, are you blushing for me? How adorable~

Would you shut up?!

[ Because he knows it's not going to do Luke any harm, Asch shoves a hand in the fraccion's face and uses him to make a mad scramble for the exit. THE GREAT ASCH ESCAPE HAS BEGUN ]

[Oh no you don't; there's a cake smeared table here, and Luke's going to make use of it. He grabbed Asch as he tried to get out, thumping him stomach first onto the table.]

Mm... I always love seeing you from this angle~

[He's teasing, but Asch doesn't need to know that.]

[ Asch let out a choice word of profanity as freedom slipped from his grasp and he met instead with the splintered hole he had created via stabbing. It didn't hurt ~~much~~ though it did knock the wind out of him, meaning Luke got a doubly heated glare for his remark. Oh how he loathed that attitude some days. Other days he relished it, but this wasn't one of them. ]

[Luke met that glare with a self satisfied smirk, before his expression softened. He leaned over, wrapping his arms around Asch and resting his head between his shoulder blades. It was... rather suggestive, considering his crotch was pressed up against his ass, but that clearly wasn't his goal this time.]

...I really did miss you.

[ For a scant couple seconds Asch tensed, muscles coil in preparation to flee should Luke be too, erm, feisty. When it was clear that wasn't the current goal, he finally allowed himself to relax, letting his forehead thunk into the tabletop with a sigh. ]

If you wished to see me, all you had to do was visit.

[ He can tease too, you know. ]

You know it's not always that simple.

[Yes, but he's better at it... and in a better position to do it. In fact, he spies a little bit of cake on your neck that's getting licked up with his tongue. <3]

Mm... I went through so much trouble to bake that right...

I simply meant that if you're here, you're welcome to visit meeee--

[ That, folks, will probably be the closest Asch will ever come to screeching. A hand gets slapped to the back of his neck, covering up where Luke's tongue was, or still might be. He doesn't care either way as he's too busy trying to shove Luke off with his other hand. ]

WHAT'RE YOU DOING BACK THERE?!

[Luke grinned. Fraccion: 1, Asch: 0.]

Nothing. Yet.

[ Bastard. ]

Don't even try playing innocent! You did something!

[ He's just waiting for Luke to come back one of these times and sprout tentacles like his darling master. At that point he'll hightail it without looking back, geez. For now he's fine just worming his way out from beneath Luke. ]

[He wishes, but no, he didn't inherit that from Szayel. He let Asch squirm out from under him, but he was right back to latching onto his front as soon as he could get to it, burying his face against his chest.]

[ Thank whatever deities exist for that. There's only so much creeper Asch can handle in his life. Besides, he rather enjoyed Luke having a more affectionate side, even if the force of his hug almost sends them both ass over teacup off the table. Uprighting himself takes more effort than it should given the replica's small from, but once they're not threatening to fall, he returns the hug and plucks bits of cake from Luke's mask. ]

Watch it, idiot.

[Luke's voice was muffled by Asch's chest.]

You're the one that blew up the cake. I put a lot of care into baking that you know.

[ Smart ass drecks get a swat upside their heads. ...and Asch gets a sore fist for his short temper. ]

I know I'm going to regret this, but, why?

[Dumbass. Fraccion: 2, Asch: -1.]

Well, I had to make it irresistible...

[ It was a reflex when confronted with stupidity, okay. ]

Where's the sense in that if you were just going to drop a damn cage on them? [ Up goes an eyebrow as if to say, "Which we are still sitting in, by the way." ]